Food for Thought

Image found here.

"If we teach about what is in every section of the Doctrine and Covenants, if we teach so that our students know all the rivers in the Book of Mormon, if they can name all the prophets of the Old Testament, if they can describe to you the pioneer trek and the history of the Latter-day Saints in the restored times but they don’t understand the promises made to the fathers and their part in it, it is 'utterly wasted.' I would submit that all of our teaching is utterly wasted if they don’t understand the context that all of this is taught within." 

-Sister Julie B. Beck, "Teaching the Doctrine of the Family"

I think this may be why I've had trouble finding religion professors I like at BYU; there are so many that go over tiny historical details which are interesting but do not teach nor motivate me to come unto Christ and be a better person. And isn't that the whole reason for the Gospel?


What do you think about this quote from Sister Beck? How does it make you feel? 

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.” - Pablo Picasso

As frustrating as Education Week can be, with the crowds and Utah hair and indecisiveness when it comes to ordering Jamba Juice, I love it. I love going to the classes and learning new things, I love watching sweet families interact, and I especially love the LDS art show and the opportunity to meet the artists. 

This morning I went to a class taught by Rita Wright who works at the campus museum. She talked about the upcoming Carl Heinrich Bloch exhibition and I am so excited. Denmark is lending us a bunch of Bloch's altarpieces and other genre paintings. The LDS community loves to use them in prints, but seeing them in person is an entirely different experience. Some of the pieces coming to the museum are "The Doubting Thomas", "Woman at the Well", and one of my favorites, "Gethsemane".

Carl Heinrich Bloch, "Gethsemane (Altarpiece)"

It's going to be a breathtaking exhibition, and if you live in Utah you should attend! It runs from November 12th to May 7th.

And as if that wasn't enough, this afternoon I happened to wander in the bookstore just as all the big LDS artists were unveiling their new works! There were some breathtaking pieces, but this one is my favorite.

"Graven Upon My Palms", Emily Pugmire

Emily Pugmire is a young artist and not as well known as some of the other big shots there. I found her booth just as she was sitting down and got to meet her, her husband, and new baby. I bought a print of this piece and she signed it for me. How I wish I could have bought a full-sized framed one! But for now my little 5x7 will do and remind me of this special day, as well as my Savior who has "graven [me] upon the palms of [his] hands" (see Isaiah 49:16).

Wie groß bist du!

Photo found here.

One of the things I love most about BYU is the opportunity to join with my classmates in singing the hymns of Zion. In the Mormon culture we are taught to sing at a very young age, and no matter what hymn the teacher chooses that day, there are always a few people who add gorgeous harmonies. It feels like a symphony - each student coming together, uniting hearts and voices to praise the God who has guided our steps to this splendid university. 

I thought singing the hymns in a religion class of 200 was incredible, but yesterday I discovered that a tiny German class of 6 can be even more powerful.  

The hymn for the day was „Wie groß bist du!” known in English as "How Great Thou Art." This has always been one of my favorite hymns, and I have fond memories of my mother singing it as she washed the dishes and cooked dinner. When I visit home, we sing it together as I help her with the household chores. 

As my class sang the song, I was surprised to see that the Germans have added another verse between our second and third verses. (I was even more surprised that I understood it!) Here are the lyrics and my translation:

Wenn ich bedenk, was du für mich gegeben
die Schmerzen all, die du gelitten hast
Du starbst on Kreuz damit wir können leben
und nahmst auf dich all unserer Sünden Last.

Dann preis ich dich, mein Heiland und mein Gott.
Wie groß bist du! Wie groß bist du!
Dann preis ich dich, mein Heiland und mein Gott.
Wie groß bist du! Wie groß bist du!

***************************************************

When I think what you have given for me

All the pain you have suffered 

You died on the cross so we could have life

And you took the load of all our sins

Then sings my soul, my Savior and my God -

How great thou art! How great thou art!

Then sings my soul, my Savior and my God -

How great thou art! How great thou art! 

I was surprised once more as tears filled my eyes and my voice started to falter. 

Truly Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the Living God. I am amazed and humbled by all that He offers me. It is a honor and a privilege to attend Brigham Young University and have the chance to associate with such wonderful people whose examples bring me closer to Christ. I am awed by the power and potential of my fellow classmates, whether it be in a class of 200 or a class of 6. I can sense that Heavenly Father has important assignments for us after we leave this university, but our works will continue to harmonize with each other across time and space, creating rich music of praise to the Lord. Just like our singing, each of us has something unique to offer that makes a powerful collaboration. I believe that our individual lives of discipleship, like our voices, will come together to create a gift to the Lord that is even more beautiful and more lasting. And that, my friends, is true joy. 

When Christ shall come,

With shouts of acclamation,

And take me home,

What joy shall fill my heart!

Then I shall bow

In humble adoration

And there proclaim,

"My God, how great Thou art!" 

Truly, Lord, how great thou art. 

All is well! All is well!

With the end of the semester fast approaching, everyone seems to be talking about their summer plans - staying in school, going home, internships, field studies and study abroad programs. There are signs from the Kennedy Center posted all over campus with sayings such as "Enter to learn go forth to serve - but where?" and "Let's get you out of Provo."

Those signs really annoy me. To me, they imply that my BYU education isn't complete, isn't good enough without studying abroad. And frankly, this is not so.

Last year, 10,409 students applied to BYU. 68% were accepted. This means that 3,331 applicants were denied a BYU education. And some of us treat our BYU education so flippantly, even murmuring about it at times. To my fellow BYU students, please do not complain about your blessings.

When I was in high school, I was one of those 10,409 applicants who longed to go to BYU. I dreamed of the day when I could go to a school where 98% of the students believed the same things I did, where 97% of my male classmates would be returned missionaries. In a high school with drug busts, rampant cheating, and no dress code whatsoever, I could not wait to go to a university where the Honor Code was enforced and even revered. I longed to attend religion classes and devotionals, to live in an enviornment where we would learn "even by study and also by faith" (D&C 88:118). Most of all, I hungered for eternal relationships, for friends who would truly understand appreciate the person I am, friends who would help me become more like Jesus Christ.

In those days of waiting and wishing, my soul found comfort in the LDS hymn "Come, Come ye Saints." It was the anthem of my pioneer forebears as they pulled handcarts to Utah. I was making my own trek to Utah with more modern conveniences, but with my own struggles. I too was a pioneer. I too could be strengthened by God. And even today when I sing these words, He truly strengthens me.

Come, come, ye saints, no toil nor labor fear;
But with joy wend your way.
Though hard to you this journey may appear,
Grace shall be as your day.
Tis better far for us to strive our useless cares from us to drive;
Do this, and joy your hearts will swell -
All is well! All is well!

Why should we mourn or think our lot is hard?
'Tis not so; all is right.
Why should we think to earn a great reward if we now shun the fight?
Gird up your loins; fresh courage take.
Our God will never us forsake;
And soon we'll have this tale to tell-
All is well! All is well!

We'll find the place which God for us prepared,
Far away, in the West,
Where none shall come to hurt or make afraid;
There the saints, will be blessed.
We'll make the air, with music ring, Shout praises to our God and King;
Above the rest these words we'll tell -
All is well! All is well!

Now this dream has been realized. I am finishing up my second year at the amazing institution that is Brigham Young University. And as excited as I am to return home to my family in 2 weeks, I am going to miss this beautiful place.

A place where we are encircled by the beautiful Wasatch mountains.

A place where temples abound.

A place where I never have to worry about people swearing, drinking or smoking.

A place where students respect the campus, creating a beautiful environment where the Spirit can dwell.

A place where it's normal for students to bring their infants to class and talk to their grandparents on the phone.

A place where people treat each other with love, respect, and kindness.

A place where I can leave my belongings unattended in the cafeteria and know that they will not be stolen.

A place with beautiful, uplifting art.

A place where buses display pictures of families instead of ads for sleazy TV shows.

A place where we sing and pray before our classes.

A place with amazing choral, dance, athletic and academic programs.

A place where I get to study, work, worship and play with incredible people.

A place where we play Quidditch on Friday nights.

A place where I have found friends who let me be my true self.
A place where I have grown tremendously.

I am so grateful that I, like my pioneer ancestors, made it to Utah. I love it here. And I raise my voice with theirs, testifying that "All is well! All is well!"

I don't deserve it.

My little brother has always been a dancer.

When I was 12 and he was 2, we would dance to The Wiggles before I went to school. He is constantly on the floor trying to break dance. When music comes on, his body immediately starts to move. Sometimes we'll be watching a movie and we will notice his little foot tapping to the beat.

About a month ago my mom finally broke down and put him in a hip hop class. He was ecstatic. He had the biggest smile on his face whole time. And on the ride home he told my mom, "sometimes my life is so good that I don't think I deserve it."

I couldn't agree more.

Whenever I look at my blessings and am absolutely overwhelmed. I have the restored gospel, the scriptures, a Heavenly Father who loves me and a testimony of Christ. I have an incredible family who loves me and has taught me what is right. I have a mom who is my best friend and puts aside time to talk to me every day. I have a roof over my head, good food to eat and a warm bed to sleep in at night. I know how to read and write. I have a job during an economic recession. I have amazing friends, roommates, classmates and coworkers who appreciate my good qualities and inspire me to be a better person. I have an opportunity to receive a college education and get to do it at BYU, one of the best universities in the world!

I know Heavenly Father loves me, but I can't help but wonder why He has given me so much and others so little.

I know that what has been given is part of my tests and trials. All of my blessings are wonderful, but they bring certain hardships as well. And I know that Heavenly Father has given me these things so that I can serve others. But I'm not sure how to do that yet.

As Jo said in Little Women, "I want to do something splendid before I go into my castle - something heroic or wonderful that won't be forgotten after I'm dead. I don't know what, but I'm on the watch for it."

Fortunately the Lord has promised that "if ye have desires to serve God ye are called to the work," so I know that He will fill my life with opportunities to serve.

Even so, I don't think I will ever quite deserve all that Heavenly Father has given me.

I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day...I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants.

And behold, all that he requires of you is to keep his commandments; and he has promised you that if ye would keep his commandments ye should prosper in the land; and he never doth vary from that which he hath said.
-Mosiah 2:21-22

Why I love this school

"BYU is not here to help you make money. Any university in this land can do that....BYU has been established to extend to you the very glory of God, his intelligence, his light, and his truth....Money and fame and earthly glory are not our eternal standard. Indeed these can, if we are not careful, lead to eternal torment." -Jeffrey R. Holland

A New Start

I'm back in Provo. Winter semester starts tomorrow, and while there is the prospect of the new classes, friends and adventures that the next four months will bring, my heart is back in San Diego.

Sometimes I feel like I am an old lady stuck in a young person's body. And life. I long for that which is eternal. Sure, I have fun in my singles ward here at BYU, but I feel more grounded in my home ward doing all the things I got to do with my mom over break - singing in ward choir, chatting with the middle aged women in Relief Society, taking meals and hosting play-dates to an injured sister in the ward, helping out with Primary children.

Making Martha Stewart crafts after dinner. Taking little ones for walks in the canyon. Reading to my brother and putting him to bed. Cutting out paper dolls with my sister. Hosting a New Year's Eve party for a gaggle of loud kids under 12, then crawling into bed exhausted by 10. Wearing jeans and a t shirt every day. Cleaning the table after dinner. Helping all the family members feel comfortable.

For the past 2 weeks I've been living the life of a mom, and I've felt comfortable and joyous doing it. Now I am thrust back into the world of the 19 year old that I am, and the transition isn't going so well yet. I'm tired of my college student life. I want to go back to being a pseudo-mom.

But of course, the Lord has other plans for me right now. So this is my motto right now:

Moroni 8:16. “Behold, I speak with boldness, having authority from God; and I fear not what man can do; for perfect love casteth out all fear.”

I believe that God is going to put people into my life who need the love that I can offer them. I believe that He has a work for me to do that can be just as rewarding as the work I have done back in California. I believe there are no accidents, that there is a definite reason why I am here. I believe that there is a reason why He is asking me to leave my precious family: there is something else He wants me to do and to learn.

I wish I could just stay with these incredible people, but God has other plans for me. I can't wait to see what He has in store for me in this next year.

Back to School

"Don't you just love...fall? It makes me want to shop for back to school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address."

Well, it may still be summer in California, but school is up and running here in Provo. I am taking German 102, Doctrine and Covenants Part II, Art History 202 (Part II of the Western art overview), Art History 300 (the Theory and Historiography of Art History), and Clogging. It is fun! I have great teachers and very interesting subject matter, but lots of reading! That's good though; I will be nice and busy!

I am living with my summer 2008 roommate, Rachel, and our friend from that term, Cristina. They are great girls. I love them so much! They make me laugh, put up with my messes, drive me to the grocery store, and just love me. I am blessed to have them in my life.

I've had some disappointment this past week. Last Friday I auditioned for Women's Chorus, and didn't make it in (they said I didn't have enough experience). Wednesday night I auditioned for the Folk Dance Teams, got a callback, but didn't make it, also because of a lack of experience. I'll be honest; it's been tough. With two rejections so close to each other, I felt for a while like these events were reflective of my self worth. I used to think that I was pretty good at singing and dancing, but after this I felt like I wasn't really good at anything. I really wanted to go home.

Fortunately, I have good and parents roommates who took good care of me, and even better I have a Heavenly Father who takes really good care of me. That night I ran into Doctrine and Covenants, Section 24 verses 8-9

Be patient in afflictions, for thou shalt have many; but endure them, for, lo, I am with thee, even unto the end of thy days.
And in temporal labors thou shalt not have strength, for this is not thy calling. Attend to thy calling and thou shalt have wherewith to magnify thine office...

I don't think the Lord created me to be exceptionally good in "temporal things." Some people here have extraordinary gifts in music, dance, languages, academics, and all kinds of other things, but I don't. But the Lord has given me another calling...and that's ok with me. :]

I heart Provo

I have heard so many people say that they can't stand Utah and they just can't wait to get out of there...but I don't get it.

I was really sad to leave home, but returning to BYU campus made it all better. I love the fresh green grass and beautiful flowers, I love the security of being nestled beside the mountains. I love the peace and solitude of campus when no one is around.I love the library and the overwhelming access to knowledge it contains. I love seeing all my old friends at Jamba Juice. I love being surrounded by so much talent. I love hearing teenagers walking across campus singing hymns. I love having memories around every corner along with anticipation of what is to come.

I love my life.

One Year Ago

One year ago today, the Lord gave me an incredible blessing.


On January 24, 2008 I found out that I was accepted to BYU.


I had been waiting for about 6 weeks to hear back from BYU. I was really really nervous that I wouldn't get in. Finally on the 24th, the admissions office called asking what my Fall 2007 GPA was. I didn't know. They told me that if it was a 3.5 or higher I was in, but if my GPA was any lower, I would not be accepted. Needless to say, I was terrified. They told me that my acceptance status would be posted online the next day.


I was in the other room with my mom, doing homework, when she told me I should check online to see if anything had changed. I didn't think it had, but I checked anyway. And then I saw this:



I screamed and laughed and cried all at once! It was one of the happiest moments of my life. The Lord allowed one of my dearest dreams to come true. Throughout the hard times in high school, I held onto the hope that someday I would be able to go to BYU and be around more people who shared my values. What a blessing that has been for me! I am able to study and grow with others who share my faith. Their faith and examples inspire me. I am able to live near some of my closest friends instead of having to keep in touch with them over the phone and internet. I am able to go to a school where learning by the Spirit is the priority. I am able to become closer to Him through each of my classes - whether it be Doctrine and Covenants, Art History, German, or Choir. I am so blessed to be here at BYU, and I know that it is where the Lord wants me to be because without His perfect planning, I would not be here.


Thank you, Heavenly Father.

What I'm going to do with my life...

So I have decided to switch my major! I am now going to major in Art History and curatorial studies and minor in vocal music! I'm so excited I've figured out for sure. I want to work in a museum and talk to little kids on field trips, and maybe teach voice lessons. The future is looking good :]

I'm finally at BYU!!!!!

Hey friends!

Today (June 23rd...I don't know why the post is dated the 21st!) was my first day of class at BYU, a day I have been dreaming of for a long, long time! I feel so blessed that Heavenly Father helped me endure to the end and FINALLY make it here. I miss my family (and all of you!) bunches, but I am very happy to be here.

I checked into housing on Friday afternoon and met all my wonderful roommates that I have been emailing for months, and they are just as great as I thought they were! Rachel is from Switzerland, Joslyn from Alpine, Kirsten from New Mexico, and Laura the RA from Illinois. Unpacking was crazy and exhausting, and I finally got everything organized just today! I definitely packed WAY too much. haha That night we went to an orientation dance where we learned folk dances from England, Denmark, South Africa, the midwest, and Romania. It was really fun, but very exhausting! Those people are very flexible!!!

Saturday Rachel, Brian, and I explored the campus and took care of business like textbooks, ID cards, groceries, etc. We got to go to our first devotional and meet many more new people. That night, we went to a rollerskating rink in Orem, which was really fun! I'm very new, but I improved much quicker than I thought I would. Poor Rachel got horrible bruises all over her body from all of her falls, but she is a tough sport and doesn't complain.

Sunday we went to church, the 118th ward! I love our bishopric and the sisters in the ward. Everyone is so friendly and sweet, and eager to participate in class discussions. I am learning so much from my ward family. In the afternoon we organized our kitchen, made cookies and invited boys over to eat them, and went for a walk around campus to find our class buildings. Ward prayer was another uplifting activity, and then Brian gave Rachel and I blessings. It was amazing to see my best friend who I have seen grow up these last two years exercise the Holy Priesthood. He has been preparing all his life to be worthy of it, and now he has the blessing of serving with the priesthood. It brought all three of us closer together, and I feel that Rachel and Brian will be some of my closet friends during my BYU experience. After the blessing, we went to the infamous tunnel singing, which I will attempt to post a little video of. The Spirit was so strong, and I'm so grateful to go to a school where I can join in worship with my fellow students at any time of day.

My classes today were great! Well, I only had one, the Living Prophets, with my roommate Joslyn. It is sooo cool! We are going to learn all about our first presidency and quorum of the 12. We have such a diverse class and it was really neat to hear everyone's comments as we talked about the need for prophets today, what we love about President Monson, and how conference addresses have blessed our lives. I look forward to my other 3 classes tomorrow and the many more adventures that will follow this week!

I love you all and pray for you in your endeavors back home. Please pray for me in mine. I will do my best to share the blessings of my education with you as I follow BYU's motto and "Enter to Learn, Go Forth to Serve."

Tasha